| THE MAN CODE Thou shall not rent the movie "Chocolat" Under no circumstances may 2 men share an umbrella. If you've known a guy for more than 24 hours, his
sister is off-limits forever. The minimum amount of time you have to wait for
another guy who's running late is 5 minutes. For a
girl, you are required to wait 10 minutes for every
point of hotness she scores on the classic 1-10
babe scale. No man is ever required to buy a birthday present
for another man. In fact, even remembering a friends
birthday is strictly optional and slightly gay. Before dating a buddy's "ex", you are required to ask
his permission and he in return is required to grant it. Women who claim they "love to watch sports" must be
treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of
the game and the ability to pick a buffalo wing clean. If a man's zipper is down, that's his problem,
you didn't see nothin'. The universal compensation for buddies who help
you move is beer. A man must never own a cat or like his girlfriend's
cat. When stumbling upon other guys watching a sports
event, you may always ask the score of the game in
progress, but you may never ask who's playing. It is permissible to consume a fruity chick drink
only when you're sunning on a tropical beach...
and it's delivered by a topless supermodel...
and it's free. Unless you're in prison, never fight naked. Never hesitate to reach for the last beer or the
last slice of pizza, but not both. That's
just plain mean. If you compliment a guy on his six-pack, you better
be referring to his beer. Never join your girlfriend/wife in dissing a buddy,
except when she's withholding sex pending your response. If a buddy is already singing along to a song in
the car, you may not, unless you are gay.
Luke Pavlick
'90 Z32 Stage III Twin Turbo 
Items in the mirror appear ... TO BE LOSING
I want to die peacefully in my sleep ... just like Gramps
not screaming and terrified like the
people in his car at the time |
